[Adventure] in Never Getting Better

[Adventure 224]

I'm not going to "get better." That's just my reality.

I have multiple chronic illnesses. They will not go away. Especially the genetic ones. 

I'm running out of treatment options for some, which are already limited due to my autoimmune liver issues. There isn't anything that's going to fix my connective tissues or prevent me from dislocating joints. There isn't anything that's going to miraculously fix my liver so that I can take pain medication and use more aggressive treatments for my other medical conditions. 

Like other chronically ill people, I am going to be sick every day of my life for the rest of my life. I'm going to be tired, if not exhausted every single day. I'm going to be in pain. There is no getting better and most of the time feeling better is out of my reach. 

This is my reality, and as difficult as it is to live with, I do my best every day not to let my illnesses negatively impact those around me. I try not to complain. I try to have a sense of humor. I try to do and be and go.

Nevertheless, there are some days when I just can't; when the pain or exhaustion are just too much. On those days I try to be gentle with myself. 

So, no, I am not better. I am not going to get better or get well. I might ... might ... feel better, temporarily. 

I understand when people say get well or feel better or the like, but some days those sentiments are nothing short of depressing. Instead, I'd love to hear helpful things like, "is there anything you need?" or "is there anything I can do to help?" or "you rest, I'll take care of that," or "that sucks ... do what you need to take care of yourself."