Impostor [Adventure]

[Adventure 271]

I feel like an imposter nearly every time I'm in a medical appointment. 

Doctors ask me questions, and as I answer them, I start doubting my own answers. I'm sure the doctor doesn't believe me. Am I just imagining my symptoms?

This comes from the many years of my life I went to doctors in pain only to have them not believe me - to have them dismiss what I was going through and ignore my pleas for help. I was told that my symptoms were all in my mind. Now I question myself every time I have a medical appointment, and am incredibly anxious every single time, even if I've seen the doctors before. 

And as I add more doctors to my list of specialists, I feel even more like I must be making it all up. There is no way a single person should have seen a family practitioner, rheumatologist, neurologist, neurosurgeon, two ear nose and throat doctors, endocrinologist, cardiologist, gynecologist, physical therapist, sleep disorder specialist, optometrist, orthopedist, and podiatrist all in the same year. 

Every appointment is an adventure in hoping my doctors believe me, even as I question myself.