To Choose Hope

Some days you learn new things about yourself.

You could learn that you're tougher than you thought; or that you have a passion for something you never imagined; or that you really do not like radishes.

And some days you learn things you did not necessarily want to know about yourself, especially when that thing is yet another diagnosis. And especially when that diagnosis comes with your doctor giving you a doctor's note to put with your driver's license in case of emergency, and with orders to get a medical alert bracelet as soon as possible and to let everyone close to me know what to do should you become acutely ill.

I'm donning my new medic alert bracelet while I type.

It's wonderful when a diagnosis goes a long way in explaining how I've been feeling and why my health can go downhill so quickly and seemingly out of nowhere. And why I get incredibly sick when I get sick.

It's scary, too. I carry medical protocol in my wallet, just in case it's needed - and share with those with whom I spend a lot of time what is to be done should I get hurt or ill.

As much as my OCD would like me to completely freak out about the what ifs of life with SAI, I'm trying to see this new diagnosis as a way to understand my health and discover new ways in which I can hopefully improve my health. 

Today, I intend ...
... to try not to stress about my new diagnosis; to choose hope and faith, not worry and fear.
... to learn how to better care for my body in light of this new diagnosis.
... to have patience with myself and with others.
... to encourage and uplift everyone whenever I can.