[Nevertheless] The World is a Colorful Place

Someone asked me the other day if I really knew many LGBTQIA+ people, as they didn't think they knew many at all.

I asked them how often someone asked them if they were straight, or what their gender is. They appeared taken aback by the question and responded that people wouldn't ask that. I then asked if they knew whether or not I was straight or queer. They assumed, as I'm a cisgender female married to a cisgender male, that I'm straight. I told them they were mistaken. Just because I married a man doesn't mean that I'm only attracted to men. In fact, I'm attracted to people, not gender, not sexual orientation. I'm pansexual. So there's one LGBTQIA+ person you know.

I also happen to have a transgender daughter who is dating a transgender male. My seventeen year old non-binary child has been going out with their girlfriend for over a year. Many of my children's friends are queer. My sister's youngest child is agender. I have queer friends. The pastor of my church is gay. One of the people who works at my favorite thrift store is transgender. And the list goes on. Just because it's not externally obvious that someone isn't cisgender or straight, it doesn't mean that they aren't. 

Then the conversation moved to how one knows they're of a "different than normal" gender or sexuality. Since it is how we are born, "different" or "not normal" don't really fit, I explained. I've loved human beings regardless of gender or sexuality my entire life. I'm no different from when I was born. A spectrum of sexualities and gender expressions has always existed, so normal is different for everyone. 

They mentioned only having crushes on "the opposite sex" since they were born, proving that they are straight. I then asked whether or not, since I had crushes on gay guys as a teen (NPH, George Michael), I grew up to be a gay man? I'm pretty sure I'm not. Or could it be that God gifts us all with different color combinations from the palettes of sexuality and gender to make the world a more colorful place?

Why don't we all realize that there is a broad spectrum of gender and sexuality, loving and accepting people for the wonderful human beings they are? Wouldn't the world be a better place if we concentrated more on who someone is as a person, what gifts they have to share with the world, lifting each other up and celebrating our diversity rather than being hung up on gender and sexuality? Maybe if we can stop putting people in boxes, stop judging people, we can open ourselves to the humanness in us all and connect as fellow humans. 

[And if you're having issues with the concept of using the preferred pronoun "they" as requested by people such as my non-binary child, re-read this post and realize the "someone" I was referring to was also referred to with only singular they pronouns.]