a not ok [moment]

[moment 275]

I'm not ok today. I'm just not. I'm trying to do things. I'm getting some things accomplished. But I'm in incredible pain. I just want to curl up in bed and rest and feel better, but even laying down, the pain is unbearable. 

I do dishes. I fold laundry. I put away my clothes. I pack for camp and for MadPride. I take a shower in hopes that it will help me feel even the slightest bit better, but it just exhausts me. I take an involuntary nap. I have conversations with a DSS refugee liaison and sound like I'm perfectly fine the entire time. I get more cleaning done. 

I'm not ok, but I turn on ok when I need to. No use in dragging everyone else down with me.