[reason 271] closeness

 

I was reading through some old blog posts when something caught my attention...

To quote this blog post, "We are a family of cuddlers." Some of us more than others, but it's true for at least half of us. I grew up hugging people hello and goodbye and before bed, and just about anytime anyone needed a hug. Piling onto a couch with a bunch of friends to watch a movie, leaning on each other, perhaps a friend laying across our laps, was normal. In college, we would put our mattresses on the floor and pile a bunch of people on to watch a movie. A friend helped me through some rough nights, sleeping in my bed with me, his arm around me, making sure I was ok. My kids grew up hugging and cuddling and telling people they love, family and friends alike, that they love them. We are open with our affection for people (minding their boundaries and seeking consent to hug or put a hand on a shoulder or otherwise invade their personal space in a loving and safe way). 

And recently I realized how not normal this is these days. I've watched video after video of people being offered a hug and saying they haven't been hugged in a long time. It breaks my heart. I've had conversations lately with friends about just how different our family operates to the norm. The words "I love you" are said and heard and exchanged daily, as are hugs and cuddles and snuggles. A friend who was over recently commented that it was refreshing that a house full of teenagers and twenty-somethings were making sure to say I love you to friends as they left the house and rushed to make sure one friend didn't leave without much needed hugs.. And it's not uncommon for a child to climb into bed with me to cuddle for a while or to spend the night. 

It seems wherever we go, the cuddling goes. And the hugging. Heck, we've driven from Connecticut to Vermont to give a person a hug and let him know how much we love him. And a sibling and a friend climbed into bed with one of my kids when they were in the hospital to offer comfort. 

Hugs are offered freely and often in our house, so stop on by if you need one.