[Adventure] of Not

[Adventure 184]

I do not.

I do not want to get out of bed. I do not want to do laundry or dishes or pack for camp. 

I would rather not cook or clean or run errands. I do not want to adult.

I do not want to help or talk or listen or do.

I want to sleep. I want to rest. I want an end to this insanity-inducing exhaustion.

I do not want to deal with people today. I don't want to be responsible for another human being, not even myself. 

I do not want to shower or eat or take care of myself or feel.

I am weary.

I want to drink cozy drinks from my rainbow mug and watch things and just get through the day. 

I do not want to be in pain. I don't want to listen to my racing mind.

I just want peace.

And so I don't. Mostly. I watch a thing with a kid. I help a kid with a thing. And I do exactly one load of laundry because I got new bras and want to wear them. 

Tomorrow I will, but today I will not. Because it's ok to not, at least for one day.