To Live Out Love

Someone I love dearly had to admit to a mistake they made. And to lying about doing the thing they did that they shouldn't have. They had to admit that they couldn't completely fix what they had done. 

We sat in a room, the accused and the parents, waiting for the truth to out. Long silences were broken by simple requests for the truth and reminders that in this family, we make mistakes - and in this family, we offer forgiveness - and that telling the truth always comes with kinder consequences than lying. Knowing it's often difficult to form the words to admit to one's guilt, I finally offered a hand raise from the guilty instead. As the hand went up, the tears began to flow.

Before they could say a word, what they had done and the love for the person to whom they had done it hit them all at once. The victim offered forgiveness as my child sobbed in his arms, unable to speak. When sobbing turned into a panic attack, my child melted into me, body nearly convulsing as they struggled to breathe. 

This child, whom I love so dearly, received love and mercy and grace - a lesson much bigger than anger and punishment. Because of this, they took full ownership over their actions and the remorse they feel for their actions. They were reassured that it is ok to make mistakes, as long as you own up to them and do your best to set things right. I am sure they don't want to relive these intense emotions - or the hurt they know they caused others - ever again. 

Their struggle to deal with the feelings surrounding their errors, their admissions, and the consequences of their actions is heartbreaking, but necessary. Their disappointment in themselves speaks volumes about the lessons they've learned. We mean it when we say, "In this family we make mistakes. In this family, we offer forgiveness. In this family, we live out love." 

Today, I intend to ...

... have patience with others when they make mistakes; offer forgiveness; and live out love.
... learn from my mistakes; offer myself forgiveness; and live out self love.
... relish the time I get to spend with my godson today.
... have patience with my body and with myself as I learn to live with the ramifications of secondary adrenal insufficiency.
... be gentle with myself and others.